There is a lack of gentlemen in the world today, made so perhaps due to the changes that have made the concept redundant. But is such a concept truly possible under the onslaught of modernity and the social upheavals that have turned the world upside down. I have learnt that today being a nice guy does not sell, and people will prey upon it to further their agendas without the least bit consideration for your welfare. In other words, a nice guy is a modern slave under the manipulation and exploitation of hedonistic and selfish people bent on perpetuation of self interest with no regard to brotherly love. People will use you when it furthers their welfare and reduces their burden, ostensibly reducing you to the rank of mule when it suits. But in times when they hold the key to pleasure of other rewards, they’ll choose to bestow those favors upon other similar flock and let the nice guy wallow in self pity and perpetual loneliness.
I’m i a gentleman? i don’t really know, for i am a complex individual with tendencies influenced by mood and preference. I’m I a nice guy, most of the times depending on history and chance. Do i like being a gentleman or nice guy, when the enticement of fate favors the emergence of this sides of my split personality. The answer is two fold, and even this changes depending on the outcome of the liaison on which fate used as a vehicle to inspire this reemergence. I love being a gentleman when this side is born of love and adoration. To do it due to societal obligation or a need to impress is not in me, and hence a person who can’t touch any chord in my heart will never bear witness to this side of me. As for being nice, I accord all individuals this privilege the first time and if abused, i turn vile and distasteful and shower the cause with scorn and resentment. i am like a samurai sword, sharp on both ends and can turn from one end to the other in one swift act. And woe unto you who cause this change, and pray that your scrawny legs can carry you swift like the wind.
But what really defines a gentleman? Pulling a chair for a lady in a restaurant? Opening a car door for her every time you have the pleasure of her company, and the privilege of owning a jalopy as Biko likes to call a vehicle. This reminds of an interesting quote from a magazine “When you see a man open the car door for his wife; either its a new car or a new wife.” This statement brings significant criticism to the cannon of chivalry and goes to show that acts meant to define a gentleman are simply sugar coating meant to snare a naive and beautiful trophy. It is not of its own noble, and is aimed at the achievement of a hidden agenda which might be tied to the hedonistic principle of the pursuit of pleasure. So, some gentleman might be a clever player who understands that in the competitive fie;d of play, the bad boy side is saturated with masters and that his odds are better by changing sides to the least explored sides of the gentleman. a lady tired of the scorn visited upon them by the bad boy will be easy prey to the charms of the gentleman wanna be and sooner before you can say kaboom, she’ll be laid then laid aside and left bewildered and traumatized. So who is worse, the player who used her first or the gentleman who preyed on her pain to repeat the harm done her and cause her irreparable damage.
So I will pull a chair for you, if my heart demands that i do so. i will do all the small things that define a gentleman, if my emotions stir at your very presence. i will give you my sweater on a cold day if the very thought of being next to you warms my heart. i will offer to cater to all bills if im besieged by the beauty of thinking of a future with you in it. I will be romantic, if doing so might make me find a place in the jewel that is your heart. Do I do this because I’m a gentleman, or even a nice guy? The answer is a resounding no. I do it because I’m driven by personal interest, an interest to become some important in her life so as to make my mundane living tolerable. And he reduced number of gentleman’s is a reflection of the low standards society have set nowadays, and one no longer has to be anything in order to secure his self interest. a guy just needs to have money and the women will flock to him. Some just needs to be good looking and you can watch the ladies fall over themselves trying to catch the bastard’s eyes. All a man needs to do nowadays is look like an eye candy or flash some cheddar and the mama’s come running as if trying out for the Olympics. tell me then, dear reader, why anyone would go to the longevity of gentlemanly when there are so many easier routes to the same destination.